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OH MY HOLY FREAKIN' BIG BEARDED BASTARD IN THE SKY!!
A god damn bird flew into my window today! The window in my 8th floor apartment that's right next to my head when I'm asleep in bed...
Trust me it's not the best way to wake up.
I'm pretty sure birds only fly into windows if you're gonna die or you're the son of Satan or some shit like that.
Great...
I'm on the look out for cats hissing at me, no reflection and floating 'face-covered-by-hair' young Japanese girls in lifts...
Not what I need right now.
OOpus
Tuesday, 27 April 2010
Wednesday, 21 April 2010
"Treat" Day...
As some of you may know I class myself as an amateur actor, and I've recently been cast in another student film, albeit one that should actually be half decent.
This sort of has nothing to do with what I'm about to say but I felt like blowing my own trumpet. (Any gay guy's thinking, "Ha ha! Like sucking my own dick!" Get a life. Better yet get two ribs removed and get your freak on. QUOTE - Missy Elliot).
ANYWAY, I'm currently getting into shape for a DIFFERENT role, (yes I have more than two), all the none believers let me know your address and I'll send out a Fuck You in the post...
So I've been killing it in the gym, drinking plenty of water and eating right. Everything's going well but I had some advice I'm not so sure about.
Apparently you're supposed to have a cheat day or "Treat" day once a week. This is where you shake up your body, (which has got used to more calories going out than coming in), by eating WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT. By doing this your metabolism will speed back up thinking you're going to be eating more shit food.
Now, as it's me there's an issue. I'm not sure whether or not to believe this as it was suggested by a guy who looks like he stepped off the set of 300.
This should be cool though... After all, if this dude is ripped, and does it, it must work right?
The problem is, I don't want to undo all my work so far as a huge beached whale of a man-building suggested the EXACT SAME ADVICE, on the EXACT SAME DAY at the EXACT SAME GYM!
I swear God likes to fuck with me...
Mr 300 could be bullshitting and the Michelin Man looks like every day is treat day.
Any thought's on who to believe?
OOpus
This sort of has nothing to do with what I'm about to say but I felt like blowing my own trumpet. (Any gay guy's thinking, "Ha ha! Like sucking my own dick!" Get a life. Better yet get two ribs removed and get your freak on. QUOTE - Missy Elliot).
ANYWAY, I'm currently getting into shape for a DIFFERENT role, (yes I have more than two), all the none believers let me know your address and I'll send out a Fuck You in the post...
So I've been killing it in the gym, drinking plenty of water and eating right. Everything's going well but I had some advice I'm not so sure about.
Apparently you're supposed to have a cheat day or "Treat" day once a week. This is where you shake up your body, (which has got used to more calories going out than coming in), by eating WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT. By doing this your metabolism will speed back up thinking you're going to be eating more shit food.
Now, as it's me there's an issue. I'm not sure whether or not to believe this as it was suggested by a guy who looks like he stepped off the set of 300.
This should be cool though... After all, if this dude is ripped, and does it, it must work right?
The problem is, I don't want to undo all my work so far as a huge beached whale of a man-building suggested the EXACT SAME ADVICE, on the EXACT SAME DAY at the EXACT SAME GYM!
I swear God likes to fuck with me...
Mr 300 could be bullshitting and the Michelin Man looks like every day is treat day.
Any thought's on who to believe?
OOpus
Monday, 19 April 2010
Time Out...
Howdy.
Anybody who continues to read this dribble rejoice! I'm back. Although it's been a while. I've been busy. Well, actually not even that busy just coping with the various chunks of shit life has dumped upon me.
Since New Year I have lost memories, had my iPhone stolen, had money stolen, been kicked out of my house, lost possessions, had EVEN MORE money stolen and been punched in the face.
Now I'll be telling you about some of these and more pretty soon. But not everything I've just listed above.
Why not I hear you cry out?
Cause this is MY FUCKING BLOG and I'll do what I fucking well want.
Seriously though, not writing for a while has slowly degraded my soul, (If I've ever had one), so there'll be regular posts again.
In my bored state I nearly watched Twilight the other day. Then nearly stabbed myself for nearly watching it. Double ouch.
Yet ANOTHER reason why it's good to be back.
So screw you but thank you all at the same time. (That's the closest you'll get to a compliment from me so take it in slowly, perhaps re-read it and smile your pansy self all the way to the free sex clinic to pick up your bargain condoms...)
OOpus
Anybody who continues to read this dribble rejoice! I'm back. Although it's been a while. I've been busy. Well, actually not even that busy just coping with the various chunks of shit life has dumped upon me.
Since New Year I have lost memories, had my iPhone stolen, had money stolen, been kicked out of my house, lost possessions, had EVEN MORE money stolen and been punched in the face.
Now I'll be telling you about some of these and more pretty soon. But not everything I've just listed above.
Why not I hear you cry out?
Cause this is MY FUCKING BLOG and I'll do what I fucking well want.
Seriously though, not writing for a while has slowly degraded my soul, (If I've ever had one), so there'll be regular posts again.
In my bored state I nearly watched Twilight the other day. Then nearly stabbed myself for nearly watching it. Double ouch.
Yet ANOTHER reason why it's good to be back.
So screw you but thank you all at the same time. (That's the closest you'll get to a compliment from me so take it in slowly, perhaps re-read it and smile your pansy self all the way to the free sex clinic to pick up your bargain condoms...)
OOpus
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